Will the real Jesus please stand up?
Our first contender is Gerald Polley who writes messages on his website in the first person as being from “God the Father”…
voicesfromspirit.com
An Open Letter From God The Father
To The World19-05-02 AJ
Well, this morning’s check of the mail altered everything we were going to talk about because I came across an article stating that the homosexuals in California are trying to attack Judaism by outlawing circumcision. It is generally known that homosexuals prefer uncircumcised boys and they are trying to make their preference the law of the land. This is another reason why all synagogues in The United States should support my candidate. Many are circumcised because it is considered more hygienic, which I disagree with. But circumcision is the symbol that bonds my chosen people to me.
Next up is Alan John Miller who…well seems a bit confused in his doctrine…
divinetruth.com
Welcome to the Divine Truth website! My name is Alan John Miller, and many of my friends call me AJ. The beautiful woman you see with me is Mary Suzanne Luck.
Just a little over 2000 years ago, we arrived on the earth for the first time. My name then was Yeshua ben Yosef, or the Jesus of the Bible, the son of Joseph and Mary. Mary’s name then was Mary of Magdala, the woman identified in the Bible as Mary Magdalene. Mary was my wife then, and the first person I appeared to after I was crucified.
Finally we have Mark Dreher who also has interesting doctrinal theories…
thenewholybible.org
Margin Call Gentlemen. The beloved one has given me the divine name of “Lord Enoch, son of Shekinah”, “Shekinah” is another name for God. My other name that you may be more familiar with however is “The Second Coming of the Lord Jesus Christ”. The world will now call me by the name “Lord Enoch, son of Shekinah”. The divine title that I have is “The Lesser Yahweh”. I am a member of “a team”. When God said “let us make man in our image, and according to our likeness”. I was the second half of that “us”. The spouse, the best friend, the intimate confidant, and the personal servant of “The Greater Yahweh”, The Lord God Almighty. The “Metatron” (the Highest Archangel) and “the Heavenly Scribe” are two additional titles that I have in addition to the title of “The Lesser Yahweh”. The fact that when I came again I would have many titles or “crowns” on my head was predicted of by the prophets, “And on his head are many crowns, and he has a name written on him which no one knows except himself”. (Revelation 19:12) And that name is “The Lesser Yahweh”. The Vice Regent of God himself.
I know, I know, your thinking “but which one is the real lunatic pretend Jesus? How can I decide between them?”
I suggest we solve this dilemma by having a WWE style steel cage match between the three with the last man standing earning the official title of “pseudo Jesus” (at least until the rematch).
///sigh…so many religious nutjobs and so little time.